08 Ways To Understand A Special Child

Updated: Dec 10, 2019

In today's time, when we speak about 'special children' we often refer to those who cannot talk, listen, see, read or, write! What does not strike our minds is, every child is special! If you belong to this generation, you cannot term any child as a 'special child'. Don't you think that you, too, are special? Yes, we can only agree to the fact that certain people need more time and, we need more patience. Children we term as 'special,' are angels! All we need to do is act out our skills!


Here are 08 explicit ways to understand these angels:


FEWER WORDS

When I say 'fewer words' it means, 'observe more!'. Not practice, it is the observation that makes a person perfect; you can only practice when you observe. Don't panic when you spot one of a kind. You are not used to it, but there is nothing that humans cannot do if they do not try their best. Observing such children might make you feel anxious at first, but on the opposite side, it makes them feel on top of the world. They feel a sense of belonging with you. For them, you become their 'everything' in just a span of a moment. Gradually, you will get habituated to things that make them happy and things that dishearten them. You will refrain from doing the wrong things in all possible ways.

You speak more; you end up confusing them.

You try more; you end up leaving them in an unwanted state.

You converse less; You understand them!


IT’S TIME TO ACT

We are born to act in numerous unknown ways. The day we were born, we turned into specific characters. It's all planned!

We often say, 'Actions speak louder than words!'. This proverb is exactly everything that you need to do. Perform out! Make your actions deeper than your words. All of us have played this game called 'Dumb-charades'. This game is all about showcasing your acting skills in much simpler ways. We crossed boundaries to put forth our acting skills to win points. Why can't we play the same game with these children, then? Why not own the 'trial and error method'?

We all know ways to make babies happy, isn't it?

Do babies speak? No!

It is us who somehow act and walk our ways to their heart. And how do we do that? We try different gestures to understand their needs. Replace these babies with those special children, and all of it already seems to be sorted. They will also cry at first because somewhere, they know it already that you are finding them difficult, but later, both of you will smile.


PAPER AND PEN

Tic Tac Toe!

Pen and paper;

You are ready to go!

This ant-size poem makes us realize that half of our childhood memories rely on 'Tic Tac Toe'. When I speak of 'pen and paper', each of us will have a smile on our face. And we know why! It's because we used this pair for scribbling, cheating in exams, playing games, testing the ink of our pens, etc.

Pen and paper have always been a task when it came to writing exams. And they remain to be a task when you try to understand these differently-abled children around you. In most cases, these children write down their needs or draw their imaginations on the paper. They try their levels best to make themselves easily understandable to you.

We pen down things that we can’t express. So, it's extremely obvious for the ones who can't vocalize, to write down things. At times, we crash to communicate with them through our actions. That is exactly when a pen and paper come in handy. Note your words and liven up your conversations. Nothing will be difficult plus, the air in the room will be lighter.


MAKE USE OF OBJECTS

A for Apple, B for Ball.

make sure you use objects for all.

In most cases, objects play a vital role in building up senses. It's always a better option to begin with the easiest. Usage of materials will help these kids to combine their feelings and needs. For instance, let us get back to the babies' example in point number 2. Parents and siblings often fail to understand what the baby in the house wants to express. In such situations, they use materials and objects to understand their needs. They observe the materials that stop the baby from crying. The same 'observation with objects' should be done with children with disabilities.

Using objects is a tactile effect which is, much easier daily. Shapes are not only important in mathematics but also for children who have a strong sense of touch.


BE THE TEACHER/ STUDENT

You need to be very clear about what you want to extract. Before teaching, you need to learn more and more. Most of our confusion begins when we have no idea what is going on with the person, right in front of us. We can be only one of either a teacher or a student. Conversations with parents of these kids will always help you to reach out to the kids. The talk and the explanation will guide you to know more about the issues and problems. Knowing more about them will direct you to draw down a way to act or easily react with those kids.

At times, we try our levels best but end up failing terribly; it's because we do too many things, but none of it makes no sense.

And then we realize that we didn't do the things that we had to do in the very beginning.

Basically, it's a 'sharing is caring' policy. Parents share their problems with you and vice-versa. You share your doubts and ideas, and they do the same. Well, that's how the solution to the whole complication tends to come out.


PROVIDE TIME

Do not procrastinate; start navigating your time! It's human nature to give up when things run out of our hands. Kids with disabilities do not give up on themselves; never! Simply because they give a lot of time to themselves. They do not feel frustrated like we do. The saddest part is we judge them even before spending or dedicating our time to them. Working parents are one of the greatest examples; they're the ones to realize it late that their children are not what the society terms 'normal'. In most scenarios, the child for whom we wait, turns out to be a weight. They become heavy for us.

Patience is the path to happiness. Be a baby but not a cry-baby. May happen whatever, make closer bonding with them instead of being a parental-stranger.

Special children often feel distressed because they see parents not being able to understand them. Just don't term them 'special' but spend time with them, play with them, understand them and then, make them feel 'special'.


MAINTAIN A TIMETABLE

When you see such children and wish to put your hands forward to help them out, the first thing that you need to do is allocating time to them. Fix certain timings for various activities. Venture each other through different actions and fill up the potholes in your path. Feed them, study together, exercise with each other, play, and have fun but yes, decide a time limit for each of these.

All of these in-time-limit motions will build a sense of timing in them. You will observe changes in their behaviour. They will start approaching you for their needs at a specific time.

Kids will start building up their motor skills in the given timing.

Timetable needs to be made for their therapies, too!

You do not have to take your time, but it's their time that needs to be taken to heal them.

Such children don't understand gifts because everything is materialistic to them but, if you ever want to gift them anything, that's only your time.


SMILE PLEASE

Not only for the cameras but also for these children. Your smile might mean nothing to you, but it holds a million meanings for the kids. Smiling might not make a difference but is often considered a sign of approachability. We, too, fear to question or ask for help to those who look rude, but it turns out to be wrong when they display their subtle smile.

90% of these kids with disabilities, always put up a smile on their face. Their smile isn't for themselves, but it's maintained to make you feel comfortable around them. So, what stops you from doing the same? Why would you not smile for the one who needs you when you can fake a smile for those who don't bother to think about you!

Realizations occur when you comprehend that things are easier when done with a bunch of happiness and pride in the mind and smile on the face.


Lastly, what makes them different than others is exactly what makes them even more beautiful and precious than others!



By Trisha Haldar

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